Stickers on Me

adam found an incredibaly aged sheet of stickers that go with some sort of  Truth or Dare kit or game, and over the course of the day exactly 5 of these ended up on me. because it’s thursday night, because it’s finally quiet, because i have 10 minutes to kill, i will answer these stickers.

right shoulder: Q: what’s the one thing you think about all the time?  A:  my kid, the neuroses i may be inflicting upon him.

left shoulder: Q: what’s the most disgusting thing you ever did?  A:  wrapped my feet in plastic bags and mopped up human feces in a BP bathroom. (oh yeah, why not be honest??)

right underarm: Q: what’s the worst thing you ever did and got busted A: the important people know the answer to this one. and everyone i know THINKS they know the answer, and i suspect the answer would be different from everyone….

right knee: Dare: stand on your head and sing old mcdonald. response : no. i spent 45 mins popping bubble wrap this evening, i’m frickin exhausted.

left knee: Q: have you ever borrowed something and not returned it? like what? A: EVERYTHING I HAVE EVER BORROWED. books, clothes,  shoes,  jackets,  jewelry,  you name it.  hand it over and i will keep it.

also, i’ve decided to finish a novel. i shall have help.

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